Don't Stay in Situations Where You're Not Valued: A Lesson from My TEDx Experience

As I sit down to write this, I feel a wave of relief washing over me. It's the kind of relief that comes from making a tough decision, one that requires deep introspection and courage. This decision was about my journey with the TEDx speaker selection process—a journey that taught me a valuable lesson: don’t stay in situations where you’re not valued.

The story began in November when I was thrilled to learn that I was being considered as a speaker for a TEDx event. For someone passionate about sharing ideas and inspiring others, this was a dream come true. The excitement and anticipation were palpable. I imagined myself on that stage, delivering a talk that could resonate with and impact many lives.

However, as the weeks turned into months, my excitement began to wane, replaced by frustration and doubt. The process was plagued by shifting timelines and vague communication. Each deadline for feedback and decisions was pushed back further and further, leaving me in a constant state of uncertainty. As someone with ADHD, this was particularly challenging. The lack of structure and clear communication exacerbated my anxiety and made the whole experience feel like a never-ending waiting game.

I found myself trying to remain patient, hopeful that I would soon hear good news. But the longer I waited, the more I felt like a "Good Girl" sitting quietly, just in case I was chosen. It was as if I was being kept on the sidelines, not fully embraced but also not entirely dismissed. This limbo state was draining, and I began to feel undervalued.

With only weeks left before the event, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was being treated as a backup option, someone to be considered only if no one else better came along. This feeling of being undervalued and under-appreciated was disheartening. It took a toll on my self-esteem and mental well-being.

After much reflection, I realised I couldn’t stay in this situation any longer. I needed to honour myself and my worth. So, I made the difficult decision to withdraw from the TEDx speaker selection process. This decision wasn’t easy, but it was necessary for my peace of mind and integrity.

Here’s the key takeaway from my experience: don’t stay in situations where you’re not valued. Whether it’s a job, a relationship, or an opportunity, your worth should be recognised and respected. Staying in an environment that doesn’t value you can chip away at your confidence and well-being. It’s important to have the courage to walk away and seek out spaces where you are appreciated and where your contributions are valued.

Leaving the TEDx process was liberating. It reaffirmed my belief in my own value and reminded me that I deserve to be in environments that recognise and appreciate my worth. By removing myself from a situation that was no longer serving me, I am opening the door to new opportunities and experiences that align with my values and aspirations.

In life, we often find ourselves in situations where we feel undervalued. It’s crucial to recognise these moments and have the strength to make changes. Surround yourself with people and opportunities that uplift you, that recognise your worth, and that help you grow. Don’t be afraid to walk away from situations that don’t serve you. Your value isn’t determined by others, it’s absolutely something you inherently possess, and it’s up to you to honour it.

Remember, you deserve to be valued, appreciated, and respected. Don’t settle for anything less.

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Thank you for reading. If this story resonates with you, I hope it inspires you to make choices that honour your worth and well-being. Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments. We need to support each other in recognising and embracing our true value.

Stay valued, stay empowered.

Mx