GOOD GIRL DEPROGRAMMING
The book! Coming 2023
Are you tired of constantly trying to be 'perfect'?
Do you feel like you're constantly being controlled by societal expectations and norms?
In 'Good Girl Deprogramming', Michelle dives into the insidious ways in which women and girls are coerced into conforming to a narrow set of behaviours and attitudes and how we can break free from these constraints.
Through compelling personal stories and research, this book offers a fresh perspective on the pervasive effects of coercive control on women's lives. It provides practical strategies for reclaiming your agency, discovering your true self, and embracing your 'bad' side.
Join the movement and learn to misbehave with 'Good Girl Deprogramming' - a must-read for anyone seeking to break free from the limitations of societal expectations and live life on their own terms.
WHAT IS 'GOOD GIRL' CONDITIONING?
"Good girl" conditioning is a term that is often used to describe a set of societal expectations and norms that are imposed on girls and women. It refers to the idea that girls and women are expected to be compliant, and polite, and to prioritise the needs and wants of others over their own. This conditioning can manifest in many ways, including:
BEING TAUGHT TO PRIORITISE THE NEEDS AND WANTS OF OTHERS OVER THEIR OWN
Girls and women are often taught to put the needs and wants of others before their own, which can lead to feelings of neglect or resentment.
BEING TRAINED TO BE COMPLIANT AND NOT SPEAK UP FOR THEMSELVES
Girls and women are often taught to be quiet and go along with what others want, making it difficult for them to assert themselves and speak up for their own needs.
BEING CONDITIONED TO BE POLITE AND NOT EXPRESS ANGER OR AGGRESSION
Girls and women are often taught that it is not acceptable to express anger or aggression, which can make it difficult for them to assert themselves and advocate for their own needs.
BEING FORCED TO CONFORM TO TRADITIONAL GENDER ROLES AND EXPECTATIONS
Girls and women are often expected to conform to traditional gender roles, such as being nurturing and caregiving, which can limit their opportunities and aspirations.
BEING EDUCATED INTO BELIEVING THAT THEIR WORTH AND VALUE ARE BASED ON THEIR APPEARANCE AND SEXUAL ATTRACTIVENESS
Girls and women are often taught that their worth and value are based on their physical appearance and sexual attractiveness, which can lead to body image issues, low self-esteem and self-worth.
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WHAT IS COERCIVE CONTROL?
Albert Biderman was a social scientist with the US Air Force. In 1957, after speaking to prisoners of war, who returned from Chinese communists who ran the North Korean camps, he published his ‘Chart of Coercion’.
The camp interrogators used ‘coercive control’ to undermine the prisoner’s physical and psychological strength.
His ‘Chart of Coercion’ demonstrates and explains the coercive methods of stress manipulation used to control prisoners of war.
It has since been applied to explain coercive techniques used by perpetrators of domestic violence.
I'm looking at how these same techniques are used by 'society' to keep women and girls "behaving".
These are the techniques identified by Biderman:
To keep us apart from others
MONOPOLISATION OF PERCEPTION
To keep our attention on ourselves and our faults
INDUCED DEBILITY & EXHAUSTION
To weaken our mental and physical ability to resist
FORCING TRIVIAL DEMANDS
To develop a habit of compliance
To make resistance seem futile
PUNISHMENTS & REWARDS
To provide positive motivation for compliance
To cultivate anxiety and despair
HUMILIATION AND DEGRADATION
To make the cost of resistance damaging