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  • Writer's pictureMichelle Minnikin

Comparison is the Thief of Joy

This is one of my favourite quotes - it's been attributed to Teddy Roosevelt. So here I am, pretty much three months away from having my actual book in my hands. EEK. And I'm in full-on promotion mode, drumming up interest.

And, of course, the likes of Instagram know this (how do they know this?!), so all I am being shown are super successful authors and coaches with multi-million-pound businesses. They are living their best lives, helping their clients all over the world. I look at all the things they've created - courses, groups, memberships and feel almost overwhelmed by the fact that I should do all these things, too.

But do I?

Let's dive into the big, bad world of comparison – that pesky little voice in your head saying, "Hold up, look at them doing amazing things, and here I am trying to adult without spilling my morning coffee." Yep, that voice is the joy snatcher we're tackling today.

In this age of filters and Insta-worthy lives, comparison is our constant companion. You're scrolling through your feed, minding your own business, and bam! You come across a friend living their best life while you're in your PJs contemplating whether to get dressed today. Sound familiar?

But hold on a second – before you start feeling like you're not measuring up, let's have a little heart-to-heart about why comparison isn't the best party guest.

First off, remember we all play the social media highlight reel game. Remember when you posted a pic from that fancy dinner but forgot to mention your kitchen mishaps? Yeah, we've all been there. So, remember that what you see online is like the greatest hits album – it's not the whole story.

Comparison is like watching a movie star and feeling bad because you haven't won an Oscar. It's like watching a chef on TV and feeling inadequate because your culinary masterpiece involves reheating leftovers. We're all on our unique journeys, and your only competition is with yourself.

So, how do we send the voice of comparison packing and bring joy back into the room?

  1. Mindful scrolling - Social media can suck us in like a black hole of comparison. Set a timer and remind yourself that real life is happening outside the screen.

  2. Celebrate your wins - Remember that time you nailed a presentation at work? Or when you managed to cook something other than instant noodles? Those victories count, no matter how small. I've just started keeping a record of all the nice things people have said about the book - it's lovely to spend time basking in positive feedback and celebrating your wins.

  3. Unfollow the downers - If someone's posts consistently make you feel like you're behind or not enough, give that unfollow (or mute) button an enthusiastic tap.

  4. Don't compare your chapter 1 with someone else's chapter 76 - We're all at different stages in our journeys. Some people will be ahead and some behind. Embrace that and learn from the people blazing a trail for you to follow.

So, the next time the comparison game tempts you, remember that Joy isn't lurking in someone else's script. It's written in the quirky, relatable, and beautifully imperfect lines of your story. And frankly, realise that someone will be out there comparing themselves to you and feeling wanting.

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